The Art Of Letting Go: Moving On From Heartbreaks and Disappointments
The only constant thing is this world is the word constant itself. The world was designed to execute change every millisecond and every living things in this world must adapt to these changes or else, they will not survive.
Changes through time affects not just the physical but also the emotional aspect of each individual. Everyone of us is logically aware that tomorrow is never promised. What you have today may be gone the next day or even the next minute. No one knows what will be in 3 seconds either.
However, human beings are bit clingy because it is in our nature to find something or someone to fill up our inner emptiness. If we have something valuable to us, whether a love one, money or habit, we tend to grasp tight and protect it by all means. We invest time and emotions and oftentimes, we forgot about ourselves. We never dare to make a reality check because we know that we are happy. But isn't that happiness is the most important?
Life is not simple and it will never be. Every moment of our lives, we will be confronted by circumstances and difficult choices. That's the reality of life. But every moment is also an opportunity to learn to accept and let go. Here are some of the tips to get started:
1. TALK TO YOURSELF: Once and for all, sit down and ask yourself if you are "really" happy. The quoted word "really" will be your keyword and you need to be honest with yourself. You have to take a good hard look on the things or people that you are so attached to and ask yourself if they really make you happy or they just temporarily fill the emptiness you feel? It's easy to deceive yourself and believe that these people or things make you happy when in reality, they are causing more pain.
2. FACE REALITY: This is the most painful phase of the process. It hurts. Yes, nobody said that letting go is easy. Nobody said it will be a quick 180 degrees turn. It is a painful process that every human being has to face once in their lives. We need a lot of courage and will to do this.
3. VENT IT OUT: Let go of Anger and Bitterness by not pretending that you are fine even if you're not. If you need to cry then cry. If you need to shout then shout. Just make sure that you will not project such emotions to others because you may end up alone for real. Find people whose willing to listen to all your rants. These people are your friends who will understand you rather than judge you.
4. STOP HATING YOURSELF: Let go of the frustration with yourself and your life. Always remember that everyday is another chance to change what needs to be changed. You have to change your perception by seeing the situation as a blessing in disguise. Everything happens for a reason. You cannot linger on the thought that it was your fault. It was nobody's fault. There are things which are not mean to be and there's something better in store for you. Instead of letting yourself get swallowed by "what if/if only", focus your energy on something that you can actually control. Engage yourself in some activities that might help you loosen up and gain confidence again.
5. LOVE YOURSELF: It is, by all human understanding that when we give love, we should at least leave something for ourselves. But for me, you won't even know how to love someone if you won't learn how to love yourself. When we lose someone, whether through death or separation, we tend to put ourselves in the situation where we feel empty. That inner emptiness will grow into a deep painful reality that we will never be complete again. If you will love yourself, you will definitely know that you were created by God completely. You don't need anything or anyone. You are soul-bounded to God that's why you are complete. What you need is something or someone to compliment you rather than complete you. When you wrap yourself with love, you will realize that only you who can fill that emptiness. By then, it will be much easier for you to let go and give yourself a chance to be happy again by inviting positive people and habits into your life.